Update from Carole & Keith in China

We had a 3 hour layover in Beijing and then landed in Shenyang at 7:10. We went straight to our hotel with our guide. We had enough time to brush our teeth and get the gift for Carson in the bag and head downstairs to meet him.

He hugged us when instructed with a sheepish smile. While Keith signed temporary custody papers, I gave Carson the bag. He opened the lego car kit and wanted to put it together right away. We took pictures with all of the officials and then our guide left. We didn’t know that she wouldn’t be staying at our hotel so that was scary.

We headed up with Carson. I had forgotten to close the suitcase with all the toys and things to use over the next couple of weeks. He dove in and wanted to open everything. Note to those of you still to come: Do NOT bring anything you can’t put together! Carson kept telling Keith to put together the Lego car and me to do the transformer. We were hopelessly inept. For two hours this went on. I put on my pajamas and got into bed hoping this would help. Nope. I got back up.

He wasn’t interested in pajamas or toothbrushing. We didn’t fight it and let him sleep in what he was wearing. He has slept with the light on both nights so far. He didn’t want to change the next morning either. I remembered that at the orphanage they change every other day so again didn’t push it since we had to go to the civil affairs office and start paperwork.

Carson has been calling his foster mother frequently. We didn’t stop him in the beginning. Yesterday, after several calls, we said no more until the next day. He cried, yelled, knocked things over and acted like he was going to punch me. Keith quickly stopped him. He also kept trying to go out the window (12th story) or out the door. We piled suitcases in front of the door which didn’t help. He is very strong. Keith covered the door and I covered the window. We are exhausted. I finally let him call her and she didn’t answer. I think she knew it was him and is trying to help the calls slow down. He finally got through around 10:30, 2 hours after the grieving and anger began. She sounded harsh with him and he hung up on her and went straight to bed. He slept until this morning.

I was able to get his clothes off finally and get some others on him. We have not yet managed a shower or teeth brushing. That will be the battle for tonight. We drove about 4 hours today to Dalian. We did paperwork and came back to our hotel, the Ramada Inn. Carson is again trying to get through to his foster mother. I don’t know whether she is not answering purposely or not. When we visit the orphanage tomorrow, we will ask the director, Ms Pan, to talk with him about this. He is very violent in his actions and really doesn’t want much to do with me. Our guide and I think that he may be shunning me now as a way to remain loyal to his foster mother. I can live with that. He has been very sweet previously. He accidentally hit me with a bat the first morning and immediately was hugging me and telling me he loved me in Chinese. He has been a spontaneous hugger up until the calling problems.

He is picking up a few words, bathroom was the first. Might as well pick an important one! He can also count to 10 and is very proud. I watch him problem solve and thing he is clever. He also loves to read. We went to a bookstore and we walked out with several bags. He has kept himself very quiet through all of the govt paperwork by reading. He even carries it and reads as we walk along the street.

I believe this is going to get easier. It is exhausting for now and we are seriously struggling. Hopefully the visit to the orphanage and a talk with Ms. Pan will improve things.